Currently writing this post and coming to the realization that summer is coming to an end—and that my friends will be leaving me to return to school in 3 weeks. They are frantically gathering up all their dorm things with immense excitement to see their sorority sisters/frat brothers, etc. Some of them are even anxious to start new classes. Around this time last year I was so completely distraught: not going away for school, not knowing anybody at community college, not even having co-workers (because I worked only as a nanny). Just a complete loss of enthusiasm for anything.
A year later, the tables have turned…more like flipped over! Community college? Okay, yah–not fun. I’m not going to sugarcoat it. There is an absolute lack of a school social life there. But my classes aren’t crazy challenging, it’s only 11 minutes from home, and it allows me to work close to full-time! I book my weeks SOLID! I schedule my classes early in the A.M. & then go to work straight after. Thanks to God’s grace, I now work around an amazing group of girls who are some of my closest friends. I also have time to nanny a few hours a week, too. I have time to keep up with my physical health and spiritual life. AND HELLO, this blog would not even be possible if I didn’t choose to go to school at home.
What I’m trying to get at is that things seem always (or nearly always) to turn around and come out for the better, or at least it seems so to me. There is often good in what seems bad and challenging at the moment, for there’s typically a silver lining awaiting your discovery if simply you look long and hard enough. It just might take some time to realize this, and patience, I know, is never an easy virtue.
“I know the plans that I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope” (Jeremiah 29:11).
At this age, everything seems like the end of the world when it doesn’t go our way. We want instant gratification, even when it’s hard to trust that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. The promise that what is meant to happen will happen, & what is happening now will be beneficial in my future is especially relieving and puts the mind at ease.
“Man makes plans, and God laughs”
This is 100% truth in my book. I live by my calendar and rarely do things on the whim. I’m a total planner and always have been…since birth–born right on time, too, LOL! I think one of my struggles with my faith is constantly having to remind myself that when things don’t go my way, I am essentially not the one in control. I can take time to make plans, but if they aren’t on HIS schedule, they aren’t going to play out as I would’ve liked. Yes, staying home for school is not the worst possible thing that can happen to me, but this holds true for any let-down in life. Learning to have flexibility and grace with disappointment only enlarges my faith and trust I have in HIM.
I’m not a homebody, by any means, but I’m so thankful that I stayed home to get my Gen-Eds done. Okay yah, when I see my friend’s snapchat stories of them going out on the weekends and dressing all cute for their school’s football games, it’s hard not to get jealous. But it’s important to bring yourself back into reality and put everything into perspective.
I do plan to go away in the fall of 2018, putting a lot of consideration into going to DePaul in Chicago for my PR degree. It is only a train ride away from my family (& my dressing room–we all know my apartment closet won’t accommodate much) and walking distance from my Dad’s office. I’m thankful for the opportunities that have fallen into my lap while being home. This past year has instilled great habits in me that will follow me to school, and beyond.
Thanks for listening to my little rant & random thoughts. The exact links to what I’m wearing in this outfit are linked here: